“And they all lived happily ever after”, and there the fairy tale ends as our protagonists, go off together into the sunset. But is life really like that? Can we really assume that because we find romance or we’ve made a new plan, that everything from now on will be like a fairy tale?
A fairy tale assumes that happiness is an automatic follow on and an automatic right that is yours to choose. Undiluted happiness in a cloudless sky with none of the problems of everyday life to cast a shadow – that’s the world of fairy tales. The fairy-tale version of happiness does not match reality as most of us know it.
The truth is that there are no happy endings that will last a life time. There is just a series of new beginnings and endings and as one thing changes, so another will come along to take its place.
Nobody stays at a fixed state forever. Although you may be madly in love with someone or you are passionate about your life now, there are no guarantees that this happy state will continue forever.
In an ideal relationship both parties evolve and change in ways that are compatible with each other. Even couples who have been happily married for decades have to be committed to weathering the hard times and adopting some compromise with their partner as both of them age and change.
The same is true with whatever life path you choose because nothing remains the same; we are all constantly evolving and the world is evolving too.
You can’t survive on undiluted happiness. Can you imagine if every day was exactly the same as the next and you never had to face up to reality? Sounds great for a holiday or a vacation but it just doesn’t work for real life.
For a start, you would have to ensure you never became close to anyone including your family, your friends and that you never had any type of pet. Why? The simple fact is that everyone and everything has a limited time span and people and animals die. The only way to avoid the heartbreak of loss is to avoid love. And avoiding love is not the recipe for a happy life or personal fulfilment.
The idea of personal fulfilment is unique. Too many people assume we all want the same things in life — and therefore we all need the same things in life to be happy.
This couldn’t be further from the truth. You could be the type of person who needs money, a successful career and excitement to be personally fulfilled. You might thrive on travel or adventure. Alternatively your personal fulfilment and happiness might come from the people around you and your familiar surroundings.
There are no right or wrong ways to be happy and you will probably find that your personal goals changes as you move through your life.
Every one of us is a completely unique being. That means that each person will need to create their own unique life that is right for them in order to be fulfilled.
Nothing is ever as trouble free as a fairy tale ending but if it was, can you imagine just how boring life would be?